Thursday, 31 March 2011

Confessions of a greasy, hairy orange (or something like that)….

When asked recently in a conversation with friends if I’d rather give up my hair extensions or my fake tan, I answered bluntly with ‘I’d rather die’. 

On reflection to this, I think I may have an answer. I think I could give up both. You may have seen my rantings on here recently about my hair extensions and my sheer paranoia about having to go out with my natural locks for everyone to see.

(The hair kit....)

I revealed my natural, extension-less hair to my boyfriend for the first time last week (in the dark, after a couple of drinks so he wouldn’t notice) and he didn’t run away in terror. I straightened my own hair the otherday and went downstairs before I’d got to the extension stage and was greeted with a ‘your hair looks lovely’ comment from my mum. I popped to the shop the other day (hair down and no extensions, large sunglasses on, joggers and my Uggs) and unexpectedly saw an old friend. First thing she said? ‘Wow your hair got long!’

So maybe it’s not all bad. I could save myself £40 a month, 15 minutes in the morning and at least 30 minutes getting ready to go out at night (oh no wait who am I kidding, I’d still wear them on a night out!) and with the summer coming up, I can avoid ‘sweaty neck’ syndrome.

As for the tan, again I’d save myself at least 10 minutes at (every) night, £30 a month, and my whites would remain white. My mum would also stop yelling ‘HAVE YOU SPILT FAKE TAN ON THESE SHEETS AGAIN I CAN’T GET IT OUT’ when I’ve had a St Moriz related accident. I would also avoid the good old Rimmel coming off on the sheets when I come in from a night out (although I do have dark sheets and black towels to avoid such things) and the nightmare of ‘shit it’s raining and my tan’s going to go streaky’. Or the worst still (and girls who wear Rimmel or any other similar wash-off tanning product will know exactly what I mean when I say this) you just step into the first bar and some dick who’s been on the ale since 5pm that afternoon spills his drink all down your arm and you end up looking like you have some weird sort of skin disease.

So really, on reflection, there’s not a lot of plus points to this whole tanning malarkey. Yeah OK so I look bronzed and like I’ve just stepped of a plane from Marbella, although I do sometimes have a tendency to go overboard and look like a greasy orange.

(The tanning kit....)

I like to think of it in terms of money (one of my favourite things, I won’t lie). So this £70 a month? That’s a spree in Primark. It’s a full tank of petrol and a bit left over. It’s a handbag from River Island. It’s two really decent nights out (where I DON’T look like a greasy orange). And if you add it all up for the year, it’s £840! We’re not talking small change here, especially for a girl in her first PR assistant roll on, lets face it, not the largest wage in the world. I could put this towards my Audi A3, or splash out on some designer shoes. It could even make a dent into the designer handbag list I have (hot pink Mulberry, you will be mine).

OK so I’m not going to end this post with ‘right that’s it I’m never buying Garnier Summer body again’, or saying ‘byebye hair extensions, into the bin with you’ but maybe I might start wearing the extensions less, limit it to nights out and once a week? And maybe I won’t tan EVERY night, just at the weekends?

Or maybe I won’t. (Can someone pass me the Rimmel and my tanning mitt please?)

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