Thursday, 7 July 2011

Men are from mars....

This is going to be a bit of a different post for me today so I appreciate many of you won’t want to read it but if you do, well, thanks!

I’ve had an interesting few weeks (few years come to that) when it comes to men and relationships. I’ve recently been on a few dates with a guy I met (yes ok on Facebook and yes, ok it started as a poking war). He’s pretty close to being the perfect guy and everything, but after I’d got over the initial nerves of the first few meetings and of course the obligatory stress over WHAT TO WEAR?!?! it’s kind of in the ‘now what’ area. This is the usual case for me; I’ve not had a proper relationship for, well, years. My last boyfriend was back in 2007…we were together for about a year, had an amazing time, and remained really good friends ever since. I speak to him nearly every day and he’s pretty good with the dating advice (altogether now…’ahhhhhh’). So why can’t all man situations be like this? Recently it’s been a case of me getting fed up too easily, or they get fed up just as I’m getting too involved.  And when they get fed up, that’s when it takes me a few months to get over my ‘what’s wrong with me’ ‘I’ll never meet anyone’ trauma.

This time though, I’ve not had any of that. I’ve had an overwhelming feeling of ‘oh well’. And I think the bottom line to this is that for once, I’m just happy with myself and I’ve learnt to finally CHILL OUT. All of the girls are back from University, I’ve got a great job, loving meeting some amazing people through blogging, I’ve got potential crazily exciting plans for March next year, I’ve got my health, my family around me, and the promise of a glass of wine on Friday night.

Let’s be fair, we all love to have a busy social life and to know we’re going out every evening with friends or our boyfriend, but I’m now at the stage where, so what if I spend Saturday curled up on the sofa with my mum and a packet of biscuits. And who cares if I don’t have plans on a Thursday evening….I’d much rather lie in the bath with a facemask reviewing products for you lovely people :) 

So yes, while I’d love to find someone one day that ticks all the boxes (not an easy job let me tell you…there’s a LOT of boxes to tick) I’m not going to get caught up in the moment and spend all my time stressing in a ‘WHY WON’T HE CALL ME’ type state. And to be honest, it’s only in the last month that I’ve realised this and been able to go ‘never mind then’. This chilling out and enjoying life business is actually quite fun! If I want to lie in bed all day on a Sunday with wine flu from the night before then I will. And if I want to go on the odd date with a guy then why the hell not. (I think the word I’m looking for is liberating?!)

In regards to the previously mentioned latest guy, I may see him again, I may not. I don’t need a boyfriend to validate my life, I’ve gone this long without one so I can pretty safely say I’ll be fine. If all else fail’s I’ll just go by my lifelong saying that the only way to get over one man is to get unde..…..Oh no wait sorry I mean ‘plenty more fish in the sea’ LOL ;) 


  1. AMEN to this! I actually really loved reading and everything you said is so true! Xx

  2. i loved reading this, its so true! xx

  3. Love, love, love! You speak wisdom darling x x

  4. That's a really healthy attitude to dating. I also think, even though it is cliche, that things happen when you're not seeking them and that you need to be happy with yourself first :)

  5. Ive always found when your more chilled n not that bothered about men, thats when it all seems to happen. Your new way of thinking is defo the way forward, being content with yourself is the number 1 rule. That said, I am hoping Mr Poking war is your prince charming :) :) x x x

  6. amazing comments thanks girls :) also congrats for getting all the way to the end, it was a long post sorry!!


  7. I love this post :)
    & I've recently come to pretty much the same conclusion. I'm finally jsut happy with the way things are if I find someone gret if not, it doesn't matter! so much more fun being relaxed!! x

  8. truly fab post, i totally agree with everything you have said, and im going through the same thing- you are not alone in this!! xxx